Brialee Turner

I wish that I could go back and tell myself how beautiful things were going to be, how good life was going to get / but I guess that would ruin the surprise / saying the wish before blowing out the candles on the creamy frosted cake / rushing down hills on a bike, looking up to see the stars and feeling the wind / running through a forest with a fairy / sparkling eyes looking up at mine / getting a library card / having a house that’s mine and my lover’s alone / tasting laughter from a voice filled with pain / knowing that I could spread my ideas like tiny dandelion seeds / loving my body / feeling strong and whole / laughing at the softness of a puppy / planning for the future, and knowing that holidays like Christmas and New Year’s can be full of love / looking up at the fading and cotton candy clouds and seeing life exists after breath stops / butterflies / the shiny trails of squishy creatures lining the path to my car / ripe fruits / comfortable touches of reassurance / pockets, and trinkets in pockets / lip gloss in every shade of rose / forming and reforming and learning and questioning / it’s so good, it’s so fucking good / and I didn’t even know